I once read a book call Ishi in Two Worlds written by Theodora Kroeber. It is the story of the last Native American to live free. His tribe had avoided detection in the California wilderness until Ishi, the last of his tribe, was no longer able to survive on his own. So, in August of 1911 he wondered into a nearby city to take his chances and give himself up.

The fact of the matter is, we were not meant to go through life alone. Scripture speaks of this truth.

It is not good for man to be alone. Genesis 2:18 (NIV)

Let’s hold firmly to the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful; and let’s consider how to encourage one another in love and good deeds, not abandoning our own meeting together, as is the habit of some people, but encouraging one another; and all the more as you see the day drawing near. Hebrews 10:23-25 (NASB)

The writer of Hebrews implores us not to give up meeting together “as is the habit of some people.” Some things became more habitual as a result of the response to COVID. We got used to working from home, gathering virtually as a family, and listening to sermons in our pajamas. And while all of these provide a certain benefit, and to some degree appeal to our comfort or convenience, they can never replace the camaraderie or intimacy that comes from being in the same room with others.

Relationships are messy—that is just a fact. And, in an effort to control the chaos, avoid the hurts, and minimize the frustrations we can continue to tighten our circle until we find ourselves alone. Of course we would seldom admit this. Instead, we adopt phrases such as “I don’t need anyone, I’ve got this;” “I’m just a loner;” among others. However, when we seek to go it alone, we become easy prey for the enemy.

However, there is another way our need for community can get knocked out of phase. This includes when we put undue pressure on others to be something they are not or provide something they cannot. The earlier referenced passage from Hebrews tells us to not waiver from sharing our hope – the hope of Jesus. It goes on to say let’s consider how to encourage one another in love and good deeds.

These good deeds and love expressed in community are what encourages us to remain faithful, to keep fighting the good fight, to keep seeking and focusing on Jesus.

There are times we can put undue pressure on ourselves to be something we are not—Savior—and there are times in our own desperation we can put that same pressure on others. This can lead to any number of relational struggles from codependence to strained or broken relationship.

The fact of the matter is, we need community. And while the role of community is part salvation, it is not designed to save us but through love and encouragement point us to the One who can. To keep our relationships healthy and our community in phase is to keep our eyes fixed on the source of our hope and through love and good deeds encourage others to do the same.